APRIL, 2005 e.v.

For those who already paid their federal income taxes.

"No doubt the mysterious visitor will come again, as the attractions of this country by

moonlight are so great that the passengers will want to see it again."

- A newspaper reporter commenting on the great Texas airship mystery of April, 1897

The headline seemed to say it all: ENGLISH WORDS IDENTIFIED ON BLACK TRIANGULAR CRAFT - SYDNEY TEXAS. Alright!, perhaps I finally had my antithesis to the March 2003 newsletter which featured the story of Kasim Barakzia, a Salt Lake City businessman who discovered seeds etched with strange markings and unusual symbols after cutting open a 15-pound banana-squash in his Baba Afghan restaurant. If the miraculous vegetable with its all-important message for mankind was indeed a "gift from God" as Kasim believed, than the 'stealthy' black triangle floating over Comanche county, Texas on April 9th evidently was not - neither the handiwork of gods, aliens or alien gods, but, rather, the gift of unsuspecting American taxpayers.

We can assume this to be true based on the testimony of a witness (a physicist and an FAA licensed pilot) who claimed that the machine's dark fuselage (constructed from well-fitted tiles like the space shuttle) contained distinct markings including the words "EMERGENCY RELEASE and RESUE" and possibly "PULL FOR" stenciled in white print among its visible surface details as it passed almost directly over his motor home "making no sound whatsoever." According to the article, the Texan found this marking "absolutely shocking." Wow! I would have thought that if there were, say, no markings, or that if the markings consisted of some undecipherable alien hieroglyphics, that would be "absolutely shocking", but "EMERGENCY RELEASE..." in English!..

But how was the witness actually able to read the markings, you ask? Why, though the "high-tech Leupold optical site (scope) on his .243 Win. Remington 700 varmint rifle, of course. Seems the Texan had the low-flying craft in the crosshairs of his riflescope the whole time. It may surprise some of you to learn that, as chance would have it, the Texan is "an accomplished shooter" and does a lot of "competitive shooting" there in the Lone Star state. Even so, he claimed that he managed to refrain from taking a defensive shot at the object, though afterwards he was still "pissed off" at the military for taking any chances by piloting the damned thing in that particular area where he or some other Texan could shoot it down! In the words of the witness: "I am sure that the military pilots (if it even had a crew...) were aware of my presence but they NEVER expected possible offensive action to be taken against them on this low level flight. The last thing I would ever have wanted would have (to have) taken a defensive shot and then find American military pilots onboard in the wreckage."

So, does this mean that if there had been absolutely no markings, or, maybe, symbols of sorts suggesting perhaps that the triangle was piloted by reptoid/greys from the Orion Delta or, god forbid, blue monkeys from Andromeda, that we might just have another UFO crash/retrieval on our hands, the result of defensive action and a high-powered rifle?

Let's ponder this for a minute. For a quarter of a century now, going back to the first sightings over the Hudson Valley area of New York and Connecticut, and then in Belgium, these elusive triangular-shaped areoforms (some extremely large) have been seen floating silently in the skies, almost always passing directly over the observer at a low altitude. And then there are the reports from credible witnesses describing how these craft are able to move from a virtual hover to high-Mach acceleration in a manner of seconds, an aerial maneuver which leads many researchers to speculate that what we are dealing with here is an electrogravitic technology or antigravity propelled device. If so, or even if just some exotic weapons platform, if the B-2 costs about $2.2 billion a pop, I'd image these things are kind of pricy, too. Therefore, it wouldn't surprise me if they were bullet-proof. These days, lots of automobiles are. Shoot, even rapper Snoop Doggy Dog's SUV is bullet-proof, and I doubt it cost over $2.2 billion (probably only half that!). So, unless Tex here was aiming for the gas tank, I don't think there was much danger of shooting it down with the varmint rifle. God, I sure hope not. Imagine the fiscal calamity! And, just exactly how high-powered is this thing? I guess all the craters on the moon are from his target practice. Black spots on the sun... Black holes in outer space... Now I'm beginning to wonder what really happened to the last space shuttle... Plus, did this guy ever consider that it might be a holographic projection, and that somebody wanted him to shoot at it? Or how about the property of some extraterrestrial intelligence who simply camouflage their spacecraft, thus allowing us to see what we might expect to see (in this case, once they realized they were in the Texan's crosshairs, they quickly added the 'stenciled' markings just to remind him that he didn't need to take a defensive shot, causing a crash and injury to the American military pilots). Hey, this might not be as far fetched as it seems!

What if I was wrong about the Remington 700 varmint rifle? Suppose, in fact, we were shooting down these (very) foreign technologies or USA experimental advanced areoforms? Wait, allow me qualify this last question: What if people in TEXAS were shooting down these things, and have been doing so for quite some time? After reading the article about this recent Sydney, TEXAS close encounter, I began thinking about the history of crash/retrievals of alleged flying saucers, and what I found was kind of eye-opening, especially the information that suggests that many of these UFO crash/retrievals occurred in (or damn near)... you guessed it, TEXAS...

It all started with the great airship wave of 1897. During the months of April and May the country's newspapers were filled with dubious reports of mysterious airships seen by hundreds of people throughout the Midwestern states, with the bulk of the sightings coming from TEXAS. These airships were described as "ponderous vessels of strange proportions" - wondrous Jules Verne-like contraptions appearing like huge mechanical-winged dragonflies strung with multicolored lanterns.

They were said to be cownapping apparatuses that appeared on moonlit nights, but sometimes 'anchored' over houses and fields in order for their strange crew members to converse with the denizens of earth (indeed, there were even airship-watching parties complete with pies and lemonade on those warm spring nights). Although, as reported by the press (mostly at the expense of the poor witness who was questioned more about any drinkables he may have had - ah, some things never change!), there were many strange instances of interaction between the occupants of the fanciful machines and those fascinated by them, the real whopper occurred on April 17, 1897, in the town of Aurora, TEXAS (first published on April 19 in the Dallas Morning News).

On that date, legend has it that one of the mysterious airships crashed into a windmill on some judge's land, scattering debris over the property. This debris was described by witnesses as being light-weight metallic stuff covered with hieroglyphics that displayed unusual characteristics (ala Roswell). Allegedly the small alien pilot of the ill-fated craft was burned and badly disfigured, and was later given a proper Christian burial by the townspeople in the local cemetery. In more recent times, several ufologists and self-described alien hunters have attempted to have the corpse exhumed, only to have their requests denied by the residents of Aurora who, for fear of such grave robbers, concealed the stone marker, making it all but impossible for anyone to find both the odd metal fragments and the non-human specimen. Strangely enough, the stone marking the alien's grave was said to have a crude triangular-shaped object incised on it, perhaps indicating the shape of the glorious gas-bag. But according to some, the spaceman's tombstone was broken into in the 1970s, with the Aurora Martian's remains stolen.

If the Aurora crash/retrieval wasn't a hoax perpetuated by bored railroad telegraphers (it might be worth noting that one writer in describing the plight of the town in those days, what with being bypassed by the railroad, spotted fever and boll weevils, claimed "Not even a Martian would be caught dead in Aurora in 1897") nor the delusions of someone who inhaled too much coffin varnish, then is it possible that the airship was shot down by someone's trusty Winchester rather than it colliding with a non-existent windmill? As sure as there's soon going to be a museum and gift shop at the Aurora site (replacing the chicken coop), a rifle shot could have caused the damned thing to explode all over the judge's prized flowerbed.

And speaking of museum(s) and gift shop(s), the Aurora incident may have discouraged any alien beings from joy-riding over TEXAS until 1947. Although the Roswell crash/retrieval occurred in New Mexico, the place is awful close to TEXAS, and I think that a good shot... with a high-powered rifle of the time... well, giddy up!

Roswell's not that close to Texas you say... then what about the crash/retrieval in 1948 near Laredo, TEXAS? Here we seem to have another case of a flying disc that may have been fired upon with the unfortunate pilot burned to a crisp upon crashing as is evident by the gruesome photos taken at the scene. Some skeptics think the so-called flying saucer in this case was actually the test flight of a Nazi V-rocket that originated from White Sands with a primate at the controls.

But unless the chimp was wearing sun-glasses (look closely at the photo of the "tomato man"), I rather doubt it was. At any rate, I don't think TEXAS Torpedoes stuffed with fried jalapeľos knocked this thing out of the sky. But add a high-powered rifle to the equation and you might just end up with a charred mess.

Okay, moving along to Del Rio, TEXAS in 1950, where a honeycombed metallic craft disintegrated over a pasture after being downed near the Mexican border. A man with a cowboy hat, rifle and can of Lone Star beer was seen in the vicinity, but the MoonDust blue berets thought it was better to blame EBE pilot error and sand mounds for this one.

In 1951 the famous Lubbock lights appeared, coincidently enough, near Lubbock, TEXAS - appeared, that is, until somebody knocked them out. To be fair, in this case the shooter might have thought that the glowing V-formation of lights came from a squadron of turbo-charged plovers or geese reflecting the moonlight. At least that's the rifleman's story. All was relatively calm until 1957 when dozens (perhaps hundreds) of people saw a strange glowing object land in the streets of Levelland, TEXAS. But something chased it away, probably after all those Chevy's and Fords, and Buicks began experiencing mechanical problems. It's tough to turn off a high-powered rifle, though, isn't it fellows?

If ever there was a UFO that appeared over TEXAS that somebody should have shot down, it was the brilliant diamond-shaped monstrosity that was at the center of the Cash/Landrum case in 1980. Because the object appeared to be escorted by several Chinook helicopters, and because of the radiation burns and other symptoms suffered by the two victims that happened upon the craft near Huffman, TEXAS, this thing might have been an unshielded nuclear reactor used by an experimental military weapons platform? Or was it once a perfectly good alien spaceship until somebody put it in the crosshairs of their high-powered rifle? The government remains tight-lipped on this one, so we may never know the truth (it was a dirty nuclear reactor, liars).

Come to think of it, didn't Whitley Strieber grab a loaded shotgun in that cabin of his and fire at what he thought was one of the greys (or those blue f***ers), nearly shooting his young son in the process? Yeah, I know this happened in upstate New York, but Whitley is from TEXAS, isn't he?

So, just what exactly is it about tumbleweed-littered, dusty towns with fly-blown Dr. Pepper signs that so fascinates these aliens and their amazing flying machines? Besides buzzard bung, chili, and sidewinder shit, the only thing I can think of is the Poteet strawberries (for their ice cream). But even though TEXAS is the home of many 'crash/retrievals', the crowning folly of all human/alien gun play (Dulce withstanding) would probably have to be the all-night shootout in Kelly near Hopkinsville, Kentucky. The carnage occurred back in 1955, and involved a family of eight adults (true, lot's of Billy Rays and Elmers, but nevertheless, adults) who were accosted by a clawed silver-glowing creature about 31/2 feet tall with enormous glowing yellow eyes, a large mouth, and elephant-like ears that bounced, somersaulted, and scurried away (only to return) after each gunshot. It is true that the circus had passed through town that day, but still this thing looked more like a modern Japanese toy monster and was even stranger than any West Virginia religious hysteria could conjure into existence. Bad moon-shine?

But, getting back to Sydney, TEXAS and our friend with the rifle. Having read the book "Skunk Works" by Ben R. Rich, who was a major force behind the black budget program for the development and testing of the Stealth fighter, I seem to recall how the former head of Lockheed claimed that America had no hypersonic plane program, and that the rumored deep black Aurora Project (which many people believe explains the mysterious black triangles) was merely the arbitrarily assigned code-name for the 1980s B-2 bomber. Even so, some researchers think that the B-2 is merely a front for an actual antigravity propelled vehicle and/or a hypersonic mothership. Whatever it is, even if just a stealthy dirigible, it's a safe bet that it was first tested out at that "highly secret sand pile" as Rich called it in his book (and I don't think he was referring to TEXAS). But how ironic would it be if the extremely low altitude black triangles were actually the latest in limos for the president (either of a shadow government, or for the one who was 'elected', with his double riding in the secret service cavalcade) as well as for other top government figures, and this Texan had it in his riflescope, deciding, though, against taking a defensive or offensive shot due to the clearly visible markings, "EMERGENCY RELEASE.?" As I already said, the things are probably bullet proof, but either way, I wouldn't ask too many questions or stir up a lot of dust about this, for we all know what happens to be people in TEXAS (even elected presidents in non-bullet proof situations). They can wind up in somebody's crosshairs, .243 Win. Remington 700 varmint rifle or otherwise.



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